Is your delayed response due to the massive amount of judging going on?
I need to hang out with girls who make more mistakes
Just to save you guys the surprise, somebody shit outside of our door.
So I realized I'm not completely sober when the automatic toilet flushed and I screamed
I was thrown in the air atleast 3 times by baby jesus
Wake up, take the dog to the trails, puke in the woods. More days should start like this.
I just remember being happy that I got that toilet fixed so I had somewhere close to throw up
So apparently using the emergency exit of the bar as a bathroom is frowned upon in this establishment...
I should be a dude... Walking a goat on a rope is a total chick magnet.
The best was when you were crying, and trying to get the bouncer to "understand you AS A HUMAN BEING"
Who gives a hand job to a 19 yr old one night then the next lets a 31 year old random man fly a plane to town and pick u up and take u to dinner?
I was a bouncer for about 90 seconds until the real bouncers figured out that I was doing their job
I have an interview tomorrow! The couple we regularly swing with said I could use them as references. Winning
Sorry, that was mean and I didn't mean it. I'm just mad at condoms
Thinking and hoping ice cream is the answer to my problems
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