well, tey weren't taking lap dances as payment today
By the way, her vagina was so tight i was worried that i would be stuck forever
he started fingering my stomach rolls instead of my vag... am i really that fat?
He told me he was a psychology major, and I responded by asking him where he hid his vagina.
I'm out of vodka and money. My semester is officially over. The way I see it, my finals are just forms I need to fill out in order to leave campus.
he nicknamed his dick "too big to fail"
I don`t remember Saturday, actually
Its ok, i dont remember 2007
I vaguely remember telling a bum she was worth more than this
Hot dogs and hydrocodine is NOT the combo of champions
Had sex in a cemetery last night during a thunderstorm. I feel like my goth points have skyrocketed
Sex obviously provides more sustenance than oatmeal.
My doctor said I can only have one drink at a time, ever, from now on. My life has officially started its decline.
Don't judge me. It's a Monday night and I can eat burritos in while bathing in the kitchen sink if I want to.
The irony of the fact that I'm going to be starting my period on Thanksgiving. Something to truly be thankful for.
I just want him to hold me after a bad midterm. Is that even too much to ask for after sleeping with him twice?
Randomize
