That's the secret to virgins: blizzards.
I forgot to tell you. I'm at a porno shoot today.
i know. thats why i need an open bar. i'll get hammered and make a toast about how his dick is like the titanic. large, but full of failure.
sometimes i wish i was a boob, they get to chill in soft and cuddly little cup things.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just so you know... i was wasted last night, but the evening is coming back to me in flashes... i made you eat gravy last night, didn't i?
I can't right now...you know Sunday night is whn I get drunk and do laundry.
he will always be the guy i fucked in the hallway.
I woke up in an empty bathtub with the wrong brother
Dude you of all people would miss her giving him a handjob in front of the whole party
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's gotten so bad I typed my will out on my phone in case it's over.
Sorry you had to clean the sheets with your macro notes
My body looks like ricotta cheese had a vacation
He's hot, clean, can actually cook, and best of all isn't a narcissistic prick. I found a unicorn.
Ride that fucker.
There are footprints all over my windshield
You said you were making waffles...
He made me cum 3 times, then immediately after sex packed a bowl and passed it to me. Yeah.. I'll keep him.
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