I want 2 things right now, you or a cig
cig
I wanna passion pit in your ass
took 5 apple pie shots. caution: flames. not digestable.
New drinking game watching teenage mutant ninja turtles movie and drinking every time raphael says damn, someone says april or ms oneil, and shredder appears And every time we see a mustache
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
after a few more beers I realized that both my wife and I like Latin men.
I like that most of our conversations somehow end in us having sex for the good of our country
organizing the empties. That sober.
I think I just accidentally agreed to become a surrogate for a gay couple
Do you think they make a "sorry in my drunken debauchery I dropped a pumpkin off the balcony and you happened to be standing right there/get well soon" card?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The only image of you you know is from reflections or pictures. Its 2d. But what other people see is 3d. How do you know that's your real face! MIND.BLOWN.
I want to throw pennies on her stage, or just ripping up a dollor bill and throw them one at a time.
I really don't think there's anything more liberating than farting.in a loud bar where no one.can.hear you
He understood my need for pizza was more important than my need for sex. He's the one.
That jawline could fucking have its way with me.
Either im seeing the northern lightgs, someone is having a rave, or im on acid.. Im most likely on acid
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