is her vagina suppost to smell like dirty taco bell?
There's a man in a pair of gray footie pajamas and a paper crown watching the kids at the playground. It was easier to tell who was a pedophile before Where the Wild Things Are came out.
Most guys don't get turned on by "skinny, gangly legged girl with glasses laying in bed touching herself." You better start working on your diction if you're gonna keep up the sexting.
My grandpa just complimented my boobs. Im taking this as a compliment but also brushing it off as alcoholism on his part.
im probably shirtless right now with a bottle of jack watching horton hears a who. this is a judgement free zone.
Bring my gorilla suit and my bong.
Oh its going to be that type of weekend?
Well at least the house will be decorated when u get evicted.
Code 10 We gotta leave. Now. I took a dump in the upstairs toilet and its clogged and overflowing, and believe me I don't want to have to explain myself to this frat on parents weekend.
somehow this went from sexting to explaining my eating disorder.
You are the tramp this city needs, but not the one it deserves.
my vag sweat smells like doritos
so now that we're not dating you have to stop sending shit like this to me okay?
I just want the relationship Bob and Linda Belcher have- is that too much to ask?!
The guy who said he's gonna suck your butthole till your face caves in is at Maggie's
I just had sex a few hours ago now i'm eating frozen yogurt making sex plans for tonight while catching Pokémon. What a time to be alive.
Um, just removed my insulin from the fridge so that I could fit our case in there. Tell me, who has their priorities straight? THIS GIRL.
Randomize
