i think the semi hot bartender might actually be a man in drag..on a similar note, what are you drinking?
if i found out she had a dick after i got head, does that still make me gay?
so she sprained her ankle somehow and her friend had to carry her out while all 7 of us watched. do we even need to vote on that or is that automatic induction into the hall of shame?
Come back. She's looking through naked pics of his exes on his phone and questioning him about them and I'm too drunk to walk away.
woke up outside on the porch naked surrounded by beer cans with a towl around my neck. i must be in heaven cause i've never seen this place before.
The bartender said he wanted to turn you gay, and we got free shots the rest of the night
If there was a build-a-penis, I would build that penis.
Best thing she said after I kicked her out "rugby guys have single handedly ruined my faith in men"
She fell off the bed and giggled until she passed out naked. It was really weird.
Probably not gonna date her.
You think your roommate is bad? The guy they paired me with is such a nerd, his very presence at a party blocks every cock in the room.
My one night stand ended up seeing me the next morning... For my interview. Guess who got a job.
She stripped naked and ran around the outside of the house while I stood by the tent holding her clothes shouting "come back" because I was too drunk to chase her. This is why we can't have nice things.
I'm not going to waste the next hour of my life writing a diplomatic email explaining that she's bitch. I have Parks and Rec to watch.
i'll...probably just offer you drugs?
i'll...probably take them in all honesty
I'm having to shit out rocks
Randomize
