do you think i can make that microwavable cake stuff with vodka instead of water?
you should probably use water
i dont have any
I am now the proud owner of a 10-12 year old's Optimus Prime costume from Walmart. Tomorrow is going to be a good day.
Not gonna happen. She just told me she puts glitter over the mole on her nose to make it look like a piercing.
My parents foreign exchange student just walked in on me whacking off. Welcome to America :)
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I mean can we take a second to high five on our sex life? I love us.
Ask politely.
Fine. Can i please come over, hang out with you, sit around a campfire, smoke tree, listen to sublime, and fuck the shit out of you?
Thats good enough.
Take advantage man but know that every anal bead u drop inside her will make her love u 2% more. It's science
library dates and plan B? He is looking like a great catch.
Can we just focus for a minute on the fact that I HAD MY FIRST LESBIAN ENCOUNTER.
Right. How rude of me to inform you that you're going to be an aunt.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Whenever I'm not in the mood and don't want to go to bed swampy, I just strategically suck him off during the second period intermission of the Cup playoffs and he leaves me alone and does the dishes. It's a win-win.
Awareness is good for change and all, but ignorance is bliss. I like bliss.
He got hotter. I'm offended on behalf of the rest of our graduating year.
You know it's a pretty bad night when an injured penis is not the worst thing that happened to you. Fuck tequila
If I hear you use the phrase "silky soft scrotum" one more time I swear to God you'll regret it
Stupid Covid-19
The universal cock block of this decade
Randomize