So he thought it would be a nice gesture to show me his list of girls he fucked. There was 70. We then went through and put "V"'s next to all the ones that were virgins...
you think the cum will come out of moms black shirt?
like if they didnt have tits and vagina, they have no idea how uninteresting to us they would be
Im celebrating the fact that the one guy who has ever denied me has just come out of the closet
While we were making out, he kept yelling at me for not coming to his wedding last month.
Yeah you insisted everyone watch Space Jam at 2 in the morning then you cried the whole way through it. You were the very worst kind of drunk.
my boobs are worth more now than the blue book value of my car.
I just remember going to take a piss and looking down on the floor and thinking "that looks comfortable" and then I was out.
Woke up in her bed this morning with a half used condom stuck to the side of my face
How can a condom be "half used"?
I've already come to terms that I'm gonna have to bone a few gross librarians, but hey, it's college
Three times. Three times I left home yesterday in search for sex, and three times I returned un-orgasmed.
My manager caught me going taking a nap in an empty room. Apparently she sleeps there too.
So you're saying that I ended up challenging a dude to Uno then proceed to punch them in the face?
there is such a gross feeling of satisfaction when the married guy i used to hook up with likes my facebook status.
Ewe he just snapped me a pic of his butt crack.. Should I be concerned?
Randomize