Yeah, I tried playing the "see how long he can stay inside of me" game.. And I lost.
when a girl says 'did you just try to kiss me' you should leave the bar. trust me.
Every time you buy a sobe you buy a bong.
I fell asleep with crest white strips on and ate one...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
im getting my college education on yahoo answers.
so the time management class we had to take for work seems to be working. I just beat off instead of waiting for gf to get home bc it fit my schedule better.
According to last night if you on the sidewalk at 12 a|m\nYour a WHORE !
listening to happy ending by mika while imagining him to run after me at an aiport in slow motion... also, dipping oreos in baileys. not taking this breakup well. at. all.
I hate him and his pretentious your-sleeping-in-the-wet-spot look.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just casually ripping a bowl in the chicken coop, with the chickens. NBD
Just in case the world ends tomorrow, I have an emergency contact group of booty calls I can send a quick "let's fuck" to before I die.
Think I have the only job where I can be naked in a room with my manager at work. Apart from hookers
I really don’t want to have kids.
I thought we agreed we were done with dirty talk for the day
Is this because I accidentally peed on you?
If y'all wanna know how far the apple fell from the tree I'm sexting during Easter service. Mom would be so proud 😳
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