how do you spell 'special'? like slow?
S P E L L C H E C K
No you dumbass thats not right
I'm pretty sure a girl doesn't give it up with a reverse cow girl...
No gym. Sooooo hung over. Just puked up the water I drank and it still has ice cubes in it.
Tonight is one of those "I'm wearing a shirt as a dress" nights because I need to get laid.
Is waterboarding an exceptable way of getting sober?
Were taking his cast off tonite. Need a saw and a gameplan. Meet us at rosies in 30.
Yes, I did know where her mouth had been, but frankly I think it was a lesson you needed to learn.
Last thing i remember is pounding jager and puking in that nerds george foreman grill. Then i wake up this morning with some random tooth brush in my mouth
Bring my gorilla suit and my bong.
Oh its going to be that type of weekend?
I flashed some kids doing a church car wash. I feel like I really improved the quality of their lives.
Did I seriously kick a door down last night... And if so when where and how hard, cause that shit I do not recall.
I'm like a freaking volcano of life and sexual frustrations
You know you're an upperclassmen when you go to a party with no makeup, wet hair, weed socks, and no shoes, take a shot ski, then leave
The one time I decide to bring people over you are laying naked on the coffee table watching the ceiling fan cause "it just moves so fast" I'm guessing you got paid today??
We couldn't find her anywhere. Finally, I saw her sitting in my bathroom floor spraying hair mouse into her mouth and whispering "I fucking love whipped cream." WHAT DID YOU GIVE HER AND CAN I HAVE SOME?
Randomize
