Ugh I have so many sins to confess tmw at church, you just made me think of many more I've made on that street alone
ok so i jsut did the walk of shame with this random guy that i had sex with at the hotel party, and the lady at the front desk said "wow you're just now leavin?"
but i am gonna have to have sex w/ him again to get my earrings back
I am spending my child support on dildos
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I went up to get a drink from the hotel room. And ended up getting arrested in the lobby. Spring break has not been forgiving this year.
You are very nonchalant about the high probability of us having an orgy.
Eh, I'm ok with this, this can work. We're the best kind of the worst people.
dude I just got a noise complaint from my apartment people for loud sexual activities. I'm framing this for sure
I can promise you that this new years eve will rival the one from senior year when we got that exchange student deported.
doing an easter egg hunt in a liquor store right now. i feel so adult
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He tied me to the bed, fucked me and left me tied up until he proved to his room mates that he actually fucked me. But other than that, best sex ever!
We're taking a shot every time Landon Donovan takes a shot. It's clever, sort of.
I'm covered in glow paint and I can't find my shirt. So, successful night
I just dropped a condom on the floor at costco in front of my girlfriend and her husband. Today is not going to go well.
I said I wanted pizza tattoo on my ass and the tattooist asked me what I wanted on it.
Woke up with a grilled cheese in my hand, it was like god giving me a high five for the night before
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