Dude she let me cum on her face
You have the wrong number I'm the she who let you cum on her face unless some other girl has let you since this morning
he kept whispering yes yes yes yes the entire 15 minutes. i almost wish it was a quickie.
You told me I was special while we were having sex and I asked why.
What did I say?
Don't ask me questions while I have an erection,
I just stood up and am wasted. I think I just admitted to my mom that I am trying to fuck everyone in New York because they're skinny and ethnically ambiguous. Meanwhile, happy hour isn't over yet.
He made me eat donuts off his dick. donuts, jen. DONUTS.
Was that your vagina? Received a text pic from a number I didn't recognize. Shaved, so no hair color cues. But it looked like your lips.
shes taking the breakup well, i walked in on her naked passed out wearing a turban with a bag of peanut butter choc chips in hand at 5 in the afternoon.
All I know is I was dancing to Shakira in his alley and I think rubbing my junk on his car door.
He did leave his bud tall boy and 2 choco tacos, so not a total loss.
Ummm, my mojito just spilled on 2 essays as I'm grading. Who says high schoolers have all the fun?
Dude, that was like bongs ago.
The friend zone. He put me in the friend zone. But said he still wants me to suck his dick. I'm in the dick sucking friend zone and I want to die.
You said you brought chipotle into a movie and I asked you to marry me and you said yes
I was angry that a college kid had a new Audi
so I peed on it
I just got free tacos, you would be so proud of me.
Clarification, I got free tacos without performing any sexual favors.
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