I never thought I would get head to the lion king soundtrack
Whenever someone from high school gets pregnant or has a pregnancy scare my self esteem grows a good 5 points
I understand Curling. That high.
i love being in ibiza. their hotels are much more receptive to walking around naked in the lobby than our american ones.
I'm taking stock of m life as of right now and my Friday night plans are to drink a 30 rack by myself so I can have a tv stand when it is finished
Ok. I am hammered I will admit it but my legacy needs to live and your the only woman that could spawn satan. We need to talk.
I haven't even booked my flights yet and I have my drug supply sorted
Welcome to the difference between being FWBs (remember how we used to see who could get more lap dances a night?) and being in a relationship. Fun, huh?
Hey man, sorry about punching you in the face, also about turning the shower on you. I just really wanted you to drink some water.
Just drove by where I lost my sausage gravy virginity
Frankly, since I met you, I practically exist in a state of constant readiness for sex
bought even stevens on dvd and enough weed and pizza bagels to last us a week.. ready to get snowed in?
I AM SMARTER THAN EVERY FUCKBOY WHO HAS EVER SWIPED LEFT ON ME
Well. Another one of my exes came out of the closet.
No reason. My tongue went numb after one shot. I may die tonight
Randomize
