sooo how much is appropriate to spend on a vibrator? what if it is really legit looking?
I'm okay, they said the swelling should go down in a week. But next time I'm shitwrecked, please make sure to remind me that I can't open a champagne bottle with corkscrew.
I found my old addy guy via fb who clearly understands the supply and demand curve of addy during finals so he's gonna hook me up.
I woke up at 5 this morning face down on my bed with gummy bears stuffed in my leggings. Yeah.
i tried slipping money on her dresser whenever she brings guys home hoping she'll start to question her goals in life... i think its only encouraging her
Your list of "good ideas" thumbtacked to the lampshade last night consisted of nothing but "tampon-pen" with a note indicating that girls could then always have something to write with, even naked.
Well I could just do a roadtrip and hit them all. Slut tour 2012.
He's socially awkward. He has a big dick. We've had this talk before, they're socially awkward because they don't leave the house they just sit home and play with it.
Finally another gay clarinet player. They're surprisingly rare.
They tried to dine n dash at dennys and the waiter jumped on their car and broke their windshield
I had a dream I gave a blow job to a guy whose dick forked off into two. I'm going to spend the rest of my life confused.
Ate a live seahorse, then tried to order a nacho bell grande from an ATM.
How the fuck do you get to keep practicing as a Nurse.
I just took the batteries out of the xbox remote so she could replace the dead ones in her vibrator If that's not love I don't know what is
The first thing I did in 2015 was suck a dick.....so.....
He signed my ass with a Waffle House pen.
Randomize
