Bel-fucking-mar, this place has more popped collars than a Hollister catalog
My bra smells like weed because there's weed in my bra
His apartment number was 69. I had to.
Made it home ok. Only got hit by one car.
Just took my birth control pill next to the cubicle where we had sex last semester.
Nothing like wearing your heels and smelling like henney in the afternoon
Covered in confetti and bad decisions
You are. Embrace it. But you are the right kind of asshole.
Oh. My. God. Dad smoked a bowl. He's been playing cards...I just told a story and when I was done, he got really close to my face and very seriously asked me if he had cheese in his beard. I'm about to die.
He tried to take a picture of me naked but only got my ass. I don't know his name but if my butt is a guys wallpaper, that's the one I boned.
And they have kittens that decided that boobs are apparently the best arena for king of the hill...
Pain in my heart, regret in my vagina
Well after the shots I danced with a homeless guy, split my toe on broken glass, and had a 20 piece mcnugget. Who says postgrad life is boring.
I just remember lots of butts and something about ranch dressing.
😂😂😂 what are we doing to these poor guys?!
Maintaining the status quo.
it’s my vagina i can do what i want to
Randomize
