Spring semester is just not the same w/o you
jungle juice + heels + stairs = broken arm
he started fingering my stomach rolls instead of my vag... am i really that fat?
Out of ice. Vodka+club soda+cut up lime popscicle=I'm an alcoholic genius.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she let a homeless guy feel her up so she could go for a ride in his shopping cart
I didn't plan on sleeping with him until he told me his mom is deaf.. Then I felt bad.
He was in the middle of making out with two girls at once, but then the guy next to me said "I feel like I'm watching Animal Planet" he stopped to give him a high five
Woke up behind one of the fraternity brothers houses in the grass wearing a guinness hat and aviators hugging a 30 rack box with a zonie on my chest next to a campfire.
Sean slept in the bushes beside my house again. Any reason he kept screaming/slurring 'it was all a bunch of goddamn lies' through out the night?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
this is an emotional support booty call
He had a flex off with himself in the mirror but he thought it was someone else for at least 20minutes.
I thought accidentally shaving off my fingertip while trying to shave my butthole was going to be the most unexpected part of my day, but no
Blacked out and showed everyone my nudes. They toasted to my nudes, and I got an outstanding ovation.
you were so high you just watched the elf.... its spring
For the love of all that is holy just take the tranquilizers Erica
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