My place. Tomorrow Night. Bring your liver, and something for it to do.
i love waking up at 5am with an imprint of a toilet seat on my chest
if there weren't so many witnesses I 100% wouldve punted that squirrel
I just threw up blood. Also i just remembered i got hit in the face with a 2 by 4.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think my whole family judged my ability to change under a blanket.
In a moving vehicle and other people in the car
You left the resturant and came back with a McDonalds burger in your pocket so ya...no more pregaming birthday dinners. Especially since it wasn't your birthday.
I was grinding on people that were grinding. Nonconsensual.
dude girls our age are getting married and having babies and I still can't figure out how to defrost my hotpockets
Aaaaaaaand dick pic. God bless america, and god bless tinder.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
my roommate would be appalled if she knew how many times i've peed in the kitchen sink
I just heard your voicemail. Glad you like my dick and think I'm cool
Mom just walked in with a bag of weed and funyuns. I'll talk to you later.
I got drunk off three vodka cranberry’s and told him to “WWE raw dog me.” Fucking kill me.
mother daughter bonding time. she's helping me make jello shots.
you poured beer in your mouth so you could be a beer pong cup for her to drink out of/make out with
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