Went to gas station for smokes. three cops pulled in. got gas i didn't need. found diff gas station.
good choice.
she took her clothes off and my dick went from =====> to =>
Discovered the secret to willingly attending my 3-o'clock class. Ahoy, Cap'n.
I saw your arrest video on youtube. you look so thin!
I legitimately woke up with a girl trying to snort cocaine off my dick.
You try staying up all night fucking a guy with a curved dick and see how much you want to go out after that.
Luke did at least 8 shots of pure mayonnaise last night. I am not sure if that is better or worse than my 2 cement mixers?
I know shes my ex. And I know she punched me in the face and stole my car to go get drunk. But it's the best sex I've ever had.
You're sick. Take pictures if you can.
I think having a vagina should be considered a skill, give me a break.
There would be some who claim I got a little "carried away" or that we "probably don't need that many jello shots". They would be wrong.
This is the Taco Bell dump we've all been waiting for.
Someone has big plans this weekend. Just went to throw away the trash and saw packaging for 3 different vibrators on the top of the stack
His truck was very sexy. Unfortunately, shortly thereafter, I discovered that the whole overcompensating thing is very true...
I remember yelling at him telling him that the strippers were "nice people."
i'd like to schedule a penis for 4pm please.
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