Can we have unprotected sex soon?
Don't quote me on that, I'm a walking boner
You're a womanizer and a bitch.
when i told him i was pregnant with his baby he texted me 'congradulations'
i pity the fetus.
I'm thinking of writing "I have herpes" on my stomach in sharpie that way I'm not tempted to show my tits tonight
I feel like we're taking advantage of the fact that our R.A has cerebal palsey.
Wait, is this the kid that tried catching a bat in your backyard with a flashlight and a ball of tin foil?
I've decided I'm going to drink again. More. Day drinking. Night drinking. Everything. It's the responsible thing to do since I'm not pregnant
Literally got mad at him this morning because we didn't have time to have sex for a third time. I think I'm getting greedy.
As long as you don't want to make a shrine out of my eyelashes It's all good
I have to go buy generic plan b after work. I don't even leave for the new semester for another 11 days. I think I just leveled up in sluttiness
I've come to the conclusion, I should prob have at least 20 hr supervision. I would say 24, but I'm guaranteed to pass out for at least 4 hrs a day
i dont believe you. i want proof. if you end up at a hospital send me a pic.
He said he would get me a helmet and bedazzle it with my name and address so the cabs would know where to take me
Woke up in a house I don't know, with someone else's pants on, and wolverine hair, to my girlfriend yelling on the phone about the 4 girls I made out with last
A world without bacon flavored condoms is not one I want to live in.
Randomize
