he wasnt into me til he saw how good i was at ms pacman. wtf why does this always happen? when she kisses pacman it was a little awkward, so i made my move. i went for more than one kind of banana last night!
she was hot for a redneck and i dont look at teeth
So I've officially decided that I AM that drunken mistake that girls hate themselves for in the morning.
According to the bell hop, we stumbled in about 4 and then cannon balled into the pool.
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Go big or go home. Or get a live in house boy you met 7 years ago and feel like you have unfullfilled potential. You know, the usual
The dorm caught on fire so it turned into a 5am pool party
I am currently in a U-Haul truck right now. Going to a party. I hate myself.
I'm starting to think that birthday sex is just an urban legend. Like the boogey man, and woman orgasms.
you guys have a strange definition of the word fun. I would have said dangerous, terrifying, or life-threatening. of course, bowling can now be described the same way.
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If anybody had to puke on my shoes, I'm glad it was you.
He fell asleep cradling my ass and every time I moved he adjusted his hand accordingly. I've found the one.
She doesn't even give a fuck about angle. I seriously gotta start doing like penis yoga or something.
Lots of tissues. Maybe pizza. Only time will tell. The stages of political grief.
Its really awkward pooping while on videochat. Even if you turn the video off.
Guess it's not a good idea to try lighting a cigarette with my stove drunk, I burnt off half my bangs.
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