I just had to sit down with an 11 year old who threatened to dick slap a girl.
He's been dead since March and more people write on his wall than mine.
So there I was.....spitting on my goldfish just to keep it alive.
Nothing on google about my condom issue. However, if you get a chance google: condom with teeth.
Oh nbd. She just had sex with a divorcee. On a charter bus. At 10 a.m. On a Thursday.
He's dressed as a power ranger handing out cocaine
Im gonna take a shit then figure out how to be better at basketball
Give me a minute. I'm trying to buy moonshine from a railroad worker named "Cowboy."
It just smells like spaghetti and despair.
I feel like it could help stop wars and begin world peace and the continents can unite for one Monday because chicken fries come back today
just wanted to eat pizza off his dick so he let me and he can never forget it
It just so happens all of their names are Ryan, so I never have to change whose name I moan.
I think my dick has healed enough that we can start having sex again
I am far too sober to understand you right now. sorry.
Right. He was like "I'll be here all night if I have to..." I was like "Well then, I'll have to call the cops..."
Randomize
