I think god was stupid personally. The clit should be inside the vagina. Idiot.
Sooo sorry about that. And crying. And comparing my life to a duck
You were pretty fucked up... decided playing hopscotch down the stairs was an excellent idea.. it was extremely entertaining
Just threw up on my desk at work. They are making me go home.
If you know any fat girls who would pay me for sex, I am low on money and morals right now
Just googled "penis wearing a hat" i think it's safe to say nobody found my ex's lost phone...
Well he can play the xylophone with his erect cock... So he's got that going for him
I am in his childhood bedroom and I feel like his trophies are applauding me and his stuffed bunny is disgusted with me. Did you know he was a mathlete?
I'm going to pound you from behind over a table at the bar while I pull your hair and call you a whore...please pass along that message to Rob
He peed off the roof and then we bonded it was beautiful
I gave him a bj as a thank you for helping. I think that's good.
I also farted in bed this morning and said, "I don't even care. My body deserves that."
Here’s how sick I am. I’m not hungry. I don’t want coffee. And I don’t want dick. So, you know it’s bad.
I think sunday funday got a little out of control. There is cheese slices and BBQ sauce all over the roof and 4 empty bottles of vodka in my room.
The whole country is going to hell in a handbasket but I got a grade A fucking and don't particularly care.
Randomize
