True but thats because hes a fetus.
what if every blade of grass was a penis?
My family is watching Intervention and taking notes. I need to leave NOW!
on a scale of 1-10how much freaking out is acceptable if you just found a (possibly used) cock ring in the head board that your parents gave you?
Got home. Hugged Mom. The look on her face indicated she noticed nipple rings.
I feel like I'm on let's make a deal. should I go with what's behind bulge number 1 or bulge number 2?
making an indian outfit so we can be pochohantas and john smith and fuck in the canoe on the night float
Dude I've kinda accepted I may leave Nola with the clap.
I might have been fine if i had magic teleportation powers and could have skipped the car ride between bar and home
You never know how much you love your bed until you sleep with 4 other people in your car.
I've never felt more disgusting in my life. And I'm including the time I snuggled that homeless woman in the puddle of my whiskey vomit.
And remember people can't hear you kick ass in space
How do I send someone an apology text for giving them a lap dance in the middle of a party last night?
Ugh. All the good hoes are in their third trimester.
No one can touch me, I'm made of fruit.
Randomize
