I think I'd rather ejaculate tabasco. You'd have to scrape out guacamole.
im sorry but my first introduction to your dick isn't going to be a pic sent from the men's room
3rd rule of buttsex she must be clean and shower recently
and skipped dinner
Then you can skip the embarrassing can I date your ex since you're a lesbian now conversation
You skyped me last night to show me the girl passed out on your bed.
I can neither confirm or deny any bear related allegations right at this time.
I'm drunk and you're awesome. let's stay this way forever.
Drinking vodka in the bathtub.... If I don't make it, I thank you for your magical parts
I fucking give up. OKC is where small penises go to disappoint me.
Oh jesus...leave it to you to hit on not one but two guys who can't fuck you till marriage.
Well, we 69'd in the Jacuzzi. If that tells you the kind of night I had. Neither of us knew we could hold our breath that long. Deff. Most. Dangerous. Sex. Ever.
This pedicure right now is the most physical I've been with a guy all month
There's a video of you almost falling asleep in a bar stool listening to Jimmy Buffett. Nekkid.
I know we agreed to cock block each other from now on buttt I WANT this one. I have felt his penis, it is godly, and I am going to have it inside of me, so shut the fuck up and leave.
It should be perfectly legal to tase anyone not wearing a mask.
Randomize
