Did I miss anything?
A gay irish pirate, a caveman and hunter s tompson.
so we also did drugs
I was going to clean my house but wine sounded better
Btw, I'm really high so I apologize if anything I say gets translated into arabic.
i'm at a baby shower....never been happier to not be having sex currently
he has officially spend more money on me than any other boy. and its all gone to plan b. awesome.
I had to download the flashlight app so I could finish taking a dump when the power went out.
5am is far to early to be on jagerbomb number 6 right now
Its not low standards. We're more of like a self esteem camp for average girls
I am too young to be this hungover
Is this your way of saying you want a sober 19th?
Not sure if you're still doing the whole "sleeping with only one person" thing but if you're not we should sleep together when I get back in town tonight.
Like I actually don't feel all that great but the fact that I'm not projectile vomiting at work makes life seem so magical
Holy shit I'm 26! That took an embarrassingly long time to figure it out, I need to keep buyin weed from this kid
Hung out near hay bales in sweaters then she gave me a pumpkin spice pop rocks bj. That was so freakin' seasonal.
Ya know, one would think a restraining order would keep me from fucking my ex.
Hungover at Subway, watching a business guy try to squeeze his way past my car to get into his. Bitch shouldn'ta parked over the line.
You truly are a temple of morality.
I am the night, I am justice, I am currently watching the fat biz guy pay a frat boy to back his car up for him so he can get in.
Randomize
