My wife all of the sudden got markedly better at giving blow jobs. Should I be happy or concerned?
If a man's penis is referred to as "the family jewels" does that make a woman's vagina a jewelry box?
I have no idea. I woke up naked on someones toilet locked in the bathroom with two baby kittens.
on the way home I asked you what exit we get off at and your answer was "just like the goldfish"
Haha...we lost by one cup to a guy w shitty facial hair. What makes me most mad abt the loss is that I could grow a better beard on my vag.
There's gotta be a lawn gnome full ecstasy around here somewhere. And by golly I will find it
I mean, I love her. But not "I'll have a threesome with her." Type of love.
I'm putting you on my Emergency card so i can spend the last ounce of strength in my hospital bed to flip you off.
To the person who put the glitter on my ceiling fan...fuck you
Why are there jello shots in the kitchen drawer?
Dude did I even see you at the bar. Cause I was for sure there then the next second apparently I was crying next to my Christmas tree because nobody believed in me.
I have a 8 minute video of a fish tank on my phone.
We need to stop going to pet stores high.
I met his parents. We played twister. My boob popped out.
I have a whole new respect for her. She chugged half a bottle of jack daniels, and then peed all over his wall. Serves him right.
Good Morning! You are sterile right?
Randomize
