Condoms? Check. Glitter? Check. Fuck me pumps? Double check. Dignity? No where to be found. I'm about to homewreck the shit out of that dumb bitch.
I've been meaning to talk to you about your lack of self-respect these days and the toll it's taking on your vagina.
i sneezed during and he said it felt like i gave birth to his dick...then asked me to do it again.
it's just like freshman year of high school, with more drugs
Her boobs more than make up for all the flaws with her personality.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Let's turn this shoulder dislocation into a positive. Come to the hospital, bring some beers, let's party.
This is my first time seeing you since your lesbian experience. SO EXCITED!
Found the puke drawer
the only two hours i was sober on this trip and i managed to break my toe. no one will believe this.
Is it acceptable to have my intern get me pedialite and plan b?
It's a learning experience. She can add to her resume that she cured her bosses hangover and poor decisions
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just spilled grey goose in my hair. You could say I keep it classy for the family Christmas parties.
who the fuck is meatball and why is he telling you to nap on the bar
They were out of soap so you started calling yourself a dirty bitch
I was christened with Fireball shots by some guy at the bar. I'm practically Jesus now.
I'm determined to sit on that face.
U were so upset when the shower ruined ur nachos. I didn't kno what to do.
Randomize