Have you learned any life lessons?
I like big butts and I cannot lie.
about to try to wax my asshole... wish me luck
jusi got death stares at taco bell because I asked if Denise was working.
you just kept swimming in circles and whenever someone would try and coax you out you would scream "i CANNOT drown, my brother is the supervisor of a water park!!
Apparently she got a minor consumption for using vodka soak tapmons
Does that work!! Please say yes
I'm okay with corrupting his young mind.
Ew! He's just a child!
AND I'M GONNA SHOW HIM HOW TO MAKE ONE.
I'm gonna go drown myself in the shower. Make sure to cover me up before the paramedics arrive. I'm too fat to be seen naked right now.
If you're mature enough to fuck him you're mature enough to tell him you don't want a relationship come on
Drowning in science and also vodka. Hope you're having fun.
I need something for rope burns and an inner ear infection. Separate incidents, FYI..
According to the boxer briefs I found on the couch when I got home, I take it your date went well??
Yeah it got awkward when the two guys we were playing beer pong against realized that I'd hooked up with both of them. Their teamwork declined after that.
I was so drunk, he put me to bed and went down stairs to hang out with his friends. Apparently, I was curled up in the closet, spooning the dresser when he came back up.
I am in the parking lot of CVS in Auburn. I think a truck full of Plan B and regret just arrived.
Why the fuck is Ian Naked eating string cheese in my guest bedroom?
Randomize
