Dude, I just saw a sixteen year old girl in a catholic school uniform buying a pregnancy test... With a coupon!
She called herself a train and then took off all her clothing. I forget everything after that.
I saw you two flinging Jello at the sidewalk if that helps jog your memory.
he said I could live with him because I'm cheaper than a dog and don't need a pet deposit. That and I don't piss on the carpet...
Yea idk it was like early in the morning and you were walking around with no shoes carrying a printer
I'm glad we're going to catch up. too bad it's over my vagina.
I'll just tell your children you were the queen of drunk town and you had a giant purple monkey named bongo
Did you blackout Saturday before or after we had sex in a random snow bank?
Omg this is like trying to sleep on a pile of ballsacks.
I don't know if should be sitting on a toilet or kneeling in front of it
You had 10 drinks. On a first date.
I just masterbated then started bawling.
On a completely different note: my hookup and i are now in a semester GPA competition. Winner gets froyo and sexual favors. School just got interesting.....
Apparently I give handjobs in my sleep. So that's interesting.
if you come you're not allowed to wear pants. if you arrive wearing pants you won't be wearing them long.
What! I said that you would fall in love? See I know better. Dark liquor makes me think everything is a dream. I barely remember saying that
they call themselves the foursome.. thats def means they're up for one right?
If hypothetically I needed to puke on the bus... how would I go about doing this.
Randomize
