doug butabi!
steve butabi!
hotties wanna shake it
I walked into his living room and saw him watching the play-offs while eating tomato paste out of the can with a bottle of wine. I'm telling you to stop talking to him. now.
I'm scared at the amount of beastiality in this conversation.
I made weed fried chicken. What have you done today?
He came on my face. Threw a towel at me. Stole my weed. And left. I thought this would be over after we graduated?
Last two new years I ended in jail by 12. Can we wait until its actually 12:02 this time to do something stupid. I'd like to spend the first minute of 2012 free.. At least.
Russians do not operate on the same level as the rest of us. hoping I wake up tomorrow
That is NOT what pussyfooting around means. Try that again with your toe and I break it off.
Well if she's the kinda girl that doesn't want you after seeing a pic of your balls squeezed together, she's not the girl for you.
Well I'm missing half a toenail if that's any indication of my night
The notary thing was a good idea. I can charge $2 per signature. I'm currently being paid in beer.
I went to a party last night....I stole all of their ornaments and the toaster oven.
Being an adult can't be all bad. I just took a vacation day solely to sit around and get stoned
You literally asked him, “Do you come here often? Do you want to visit my vagina?” With no hesitation
no, it was more of an i-don't-think-he-even-knows-what-a-clitoris-is, bad.
Randomize
