Yeah well I just ate cereal out of a muffin pan with a fork. I'll flip a coin as to who has to tackle that pile of dishes we've neglected for 3 weeks.
in the 'for' section of the check i put "when we got drunk and broke things". again im sorry.
Eating in charleston sc at a seafood place called "hymans". Like normal I had no problem finding it.
woke up to an unread text message i sent to myself: "brreakfdast..pork and ice cream."
she gave him a mild concussion from throwing him against the wall in an attempt to dance with him. gotta love monday nights at the sandbar.
there is potential here for me to have a consistent access to someone's dick who isn't actually an asshole. i think i'm ready for a relationship.
Freshman Move In Day, its like Christmas in August.
Dude, how the hell did you become an RA?
Well I pulled a muscle in my leg dancing in the tanning booth drunk at 1 pm soooo there's that
Josh has a goal of being naked in every RAs room this year. He's already 3/11.
you were yelling that somebody needed to take your bra off with such enthusiasm my first thought was that you were on fire.
So he says to my dad "I'll pull out of your daughter but I'm not going to apologize". Yea, my night was fun.
The crooked penis I maybe could have looked past...but no foreplay? Deal breaker.
Well you were already wet from trying to drink straight from the faucet, so I just put you in the bathtub with a pillow and called it a night
I tried to be mean but not so mean that he won't bone me next weekend
Can you have a quarter life crisis another time? I'm trying to masterbate.
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