He asked me if I "almost moaned"
she gave me a disgusted look and asked how i could live with myself. because i havent seen the rocky horror picture show. and then dumped me.
You kept saying thank you to the automatic toilet as it flushed your puke.
I am 100% positive that I have seen a porno that was shot in this bar.
This is working out surprisingly well considering it started out with us using a christmas tree as a battering ram
Get out here. Doing shots with the delivery guy. Also, the food is here
Could be my worst decision since the whole 'third degree burn' fiasco.
Is there a non-awkward way to tell a girl I work with that she looks just like my favourite pornstar?
Well for number 40 i would prefer to at least like the guy attached to the dick
That would make regret #10
He was more like the original regret
Do you still have "be bumpin" written on your ass in glitter pen? Who brings a glitter pen to a bar? Or pulls there ass out for that matter...
low point in my life last night. licked pizza grease off my iphone screen..
My lunch = taste testing salsas for A&P. They gave me a free 64oz grape juice as a thank you. So, now we have something to drink in the house. So while you are spending all the money on breakfast rolls and pizza for lunch, I'm cigaretteless and whoring myself for tablespoons of salsa and free juice.
Just threw up mid-poop. I can't drink like I used to.
rowboat hit a rock. taking on water. going down fast. bring cheerios.
aye aye capn
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