Paul doesn't remember going to the bar and slept on someone's porch...doesn't know whose porch...maybe near Howard U.
how do we leave politely?
Tell them I'm going into labor. I will spill a beer and tell them m water broke.
I was sleeping on the bathroom floor and thought a wet towel might keep me warm.
Apperanlty I was screaming "It's hard to swim with a broken ankle sir" and then tackled the lifeguard. The joys of blackouts
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm sorry I murdered your sperm with my alcohol saturated Olympic uterus.
You had me at "mimosas" several texts ago.
He's sitting in his room on Facebook with nothing but a pillow covering his crotch. I can't help you at the moment.
You force fed me pizza in bed last night. That was fun
I feel like weed makes my smarter. I'm watching the stocks and the way I understand if, do not invest in Yahoo right now because they are not fit for that.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i refuse to take responsibility for eating Chuck E Cheese pizza and having any other repercussions than the shits.
When i said you could use my car and have sex in the back....i wasn't being serious.
We're at an agreement where I don't pry and she pretends blissful ignorance
you should come have a drink with me (non alcoholic or otherwise) im at the same bar as your sister and a few guys that would apparently "lick your butthole"-congratulations
Angels sing when his face is between my thighs. I came 3 times before he even came up for air.
Found my paycheck. It was in the freezer
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