Goddamnit I hate your level headedness
Writing a book: The Evolution of the Douche Bag: From Popped Collars to Ed Hardy Shirts. Doing research now.
Make sure you include chapters on white sunglasses, spray tans, and toxic amounts of hair gel.
he was so hot that i framed the used condom. it's not trash, it's art.
After he proceded to violently molest my tits until 9 am i snuck out of his room only to meet his mother downstairs, who informed me she heard the giant sexfest going on in the room next to them.. this was before she called us both "chickenshits".. worst walk of shame ever.
Me too. I'd like to spend all next summer high and drunk and riding ponies and boys.
Some bum walked up and watched me getting head last night for like 5 mins before I noticed him
I just showed my tits to my brother on chatroulette. Could my life get any worse?
dude, i have to cancel tonight, my neighbor just bought a goat
I went from a chick that didn't like to have sex to one that can't get enough of it. I can't believe I'm going to say this but at 27 I think I need a happy medium
Im going home to examine my vagina with a hand mirror. wish me luck.
Fuck. The basement bathroom I've been getting head in for 6 months just went 'Out of Service'.
I no longer exist. I have transformed into a puddle of sex.
You left a bit of molly on the table and my mom found it. She asked what it was, I said "not drugs"
She believed me because "leaving that much behind on the table would be a waste so obviously it's not drugs."
Thank you for helping a fellow gay friend today. You are sublime and deserve free tickets to the Ellen show
I'm not drunk or hungover and I don't have to work. My body is sooo confused!
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