Spotted on freeway- girl in ford focus takes a hit from a 7 inch pipe while knee driving. She winked at me. I want her life.
speaking of unleashing monsters, we need to get condoms
It's a law of Nature, girls naturally hate eachother. It's only when there's no competition for a mate that they can hate each other a little less and then are appropriated into the "BFF" slot.
Just saw ur first draft of ur suicide note.
You spelled "worthless" wrong.
It's sad really how 5 am brings with it a distinction from drunken to pathetic.
I cannot even. Taco bell reception. Beers. New friends from Georgia.
Apparently I walked up to him, mumbled something incoherently, then started to make out with him. Why does this always happen.
I know. he thinks we're 'meant to be'. No we're fucking not. God wouldn't give my soulmate a pencil dick.
$645 later, she's throwing up in my washroom and asking for a cab. Hooker are soooo much cheaper.
Soo I woke up in the storage room at best western....I dont even know what say
I'm shoveling snow with a camel-pack full of beer in a blizzard. I love snow days as an adult!!!
The joke is on me because whale penis is forever in my search history.
Worth it.
I just laughed so hard that my back cracked so hard that I thought I was cumming. Magic
He caught me mid-escape...one leg out the window, bra n thong in hand.I just looked at him and said "Bye Now" n proceeded to fall out his window....then.... tell me why he texted me 30 min later to make sure i got home ok! #igotthis
I’ve got full Covid immunity, blonde hair and great tits! I’m basically unstoppable
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