i effin hate jeff goldbloom.
but i totally would still bang him
ice luge is my downfall...
...u mean upfall.
There's a lady carrying her kids toy animals in a crown royal bag. Mom of the year.
He's sitting on the floor holding his bracket and crying, literally crying... he just keeps saying "Kansas how could you?" over and over
You will receive a large, large reward, worth much more than the actual phone you are holding, paid not only in cash but in sexual favors, if you return this phone! Please respond if you're interested in cash/sex/or just being a good person. Thanks and hope to hear from you soon!
No. He burped at a 3 year old, roared at him and proceeded to scream at the kid's parents to watch their child. The manager of Olive Garden was on our side.
At what point lastnight did a lens fall out of my glasses and nobody tell me?
I feel like the devil is trying to impregnate me through my eyeballs.
i just honestly didn't believe you when you said your brother was a fucking clown. ho shit you weren't kidding.
My mouth feels like it's at the dentist but my body feels like it's at the strip club.
I couldn't fall back asleep it was too bright so I just took my sports bra off and put it over my eyes
I got unbelievably drunk yesterday, need some time off. Apparently pulling your balls out to make your buddy's girlfriend miss beerpong shots is frowned upon.
I can't wait til me and pit bull can just be together
How does a face ride mean we're back together?
I WOULD NEVER LIE ABOUT SOMETHING AS SERIOUS AS SABADO GIGANTE BEING CANCELED
Randomize
