I think someone spiked my drink last night. .. Like all 20 of them.
1 I really miss college walks of shame 2 I think I may have killed this girls cat
He compliments me like a gay guy and fucks me like a starved nympho. I'm in love.
I swallowed for you. Answer the phone.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's a system.. i get to hook up with them and you get to play words with friends with them afterwards.
I didnt say frisky time, just alone time, to chat, or watch a show, or stare into one anothers eyes, or souls, or asses, whatever you straight people do
He said he would pay my bar tab if he couldn't answer my question. He lost to the age old question of our youth. Why did pogs go out of style.
You tried to get the Waffle House waitress to put a candle in your cheesy hash browns.
Please keep in mind you are asking relationship advice from a girl who fucked a guy just because we have the same name. Just keep that in mind.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't remember anything after falling in the ditch, but I now have confirmation that my rib is broken. Never drinking again.
I wish more of my problems were easily solvable by taking a good long shit.
Like I'm not tryna become president or marry a doctor or some shit here, like one level above garbage is all I'm asking for
If people had ratings on Tinder I'd give you 5 out of 5 stars.
I just didn't expect to have anal in a retail store at 9 AM on a Tuesday.
I told him I thought I was pregnant and he told me he accidentally killed my bird.
Circle of life.
Randomize