does wine, beer, and vodka mix well??
dude, everything can mix, this is college.
So guess who had sex in a Ghostbusters sleeping bag.
somethin' about having sex in my parents bed makes me feel like l'm finally an adult.
just dropped my bong into 7 pieces, and carried the glass shards around my house. dad saw the blood dripping down my arms, and asked if i slit my wrists. way too high to laugh at this.
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i'm satisfied with the level of pretty that his new girlfriend isn't.
She says she'll teach me how to make her squirt tonight so yea, I'm bailing again. I'm not sayin sorry since you don't have a better offer.
I want you inside of me and on top of me and under me and behind me
Basically I need you to be like god, just fucking everywhere
Topless dodge ball cldnt top that
Debating going to the grocery store with my vibrator still in, cause I can't stand the idea of it out. Lets do some risk/reward
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Where the fuck do you get consience sedatives from?
It's the third day of class and I got told I smell like a distillery.
Dude mama brought home the bacon, i got his HBO account i guess that makes up for his by par skills in bed.
You fell out of his top bunk onto his set of golf clubs. After seeing blood on your leg, you proceeded to sing "the first cut is the deepest" while sprawled on the golf clubs
all I know is that I was naked, and there were cheeto puffs everywhere...
on one hand I spent like $120 last night..on the other that was the best sex of my life
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