Baton twirling is one of his activities on facebook.
Also he is "an Ohio stae gran champion twirler". You cannot tell me he's straight
Does it count as a shower if I just sat in the tub singing I'm a Little Teapot?
Here. I am here. I do not know where here is but it includes condom balloons, a keg castle, and a shaved goat. Do not find me...I am in post blackout heaven.
Welll when you have a beer at 8:30 am you've already decided whaat kind of Sunday it ism
I maybe late, he's in a peeing contest with the neighbor's dog. Currently he's in the lead.
Once two people had broken bones it had become a bulk hospital trip so we took the party bus
And then I passed out in my towel and was woken up by my roommate introducing me to her trick for the night.
No, you don't understand. If the words "stop," "alcohol poisoning," and "regret" aren't in the same sentence by the end of the night, I will have failed this birthday.
She's the one that asked you what my favorite color was & handed you a piece of bacon
The guy I brought home last night made a speedy escape while I was in the bathroom. The only trace I found of his flight was a lone sock on the stairs.... It was like a whorey low budget Cinderella
His legs actually look hot in that dress. He might even make a better girl than Josh
What am I supposed to say? "Hi new uncle in law once I tried cocaine in Mexico and every once in a while i motorboat strangers. so happy to be a part of your family"
I'M MAKING HIKING PLANS WITH THE GIRL WHO IS DATING MY EX, THAT IS PERSONAL FUCKING GROWTH
IT IS EARTH DAY, RECORD STORE DAY, 4/20 EVE, AND SATURDAY ALL AT THE SAME TIME!
I had a good weekend too...although I cried about the dog in a drunken stupor last night...not one of my finest moments, but it's all water under the bridge.
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