i want to fuck
?
it's pretty self explanatory
I will make out with the first guy who tries to pick me up with a lyric from a rap song. I won't even reply, just be on him like whoa.
I thought pig tail meant you were suppose to grab on to it when getting BJ
Dude... Hand job in the lake... It was as weird as it sounds.
JUST SAW MY DRUG DEALER SOBER AND GOING TO CLASS. This is weird, its almost like he's an actual student whio leaves his room...
Yes theres a double standard. Get over it. Fuck the critics and go be the slut you were born to be
We ran out of ice cubes so I used ice cream. Everyone thought that was the plan all along. I just went with it.
I totally accidentally said "we don't go around hammering girls in the rear" in front of 132 5th graders today.
I successfully convinced a drunk NDSU student that their school does not have a football team and another that they weren't in Fargo. I'm a dangerous sober shark in a sea of drunks.
I might as well walk around wearing a sandwich board and accept the fact that I'm dying single.
I thought the dude was just really enjoying his piss but apparently he was jerkin off into the urinal.
Pretty sure the delivery guy saw me taking a shit this morning
You sealing the pinky promise with a shot was much better than just kissing it
Totally writing my paper on the toilet. Makes me miss you.
Dude... this pee is not alleged
YOU SAT ON MY LAP!
Wuddup pee lap
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