It says i should accept HIV aids as my friend on facebook.We have 12 friends in common. I need new friends.
she's googling pictures of Freddy Mercury and whispering 'I'm ready'
I cant leave dude. theres a horse with a top hat on
i woke up and the dog was eating spaghetti off my chest.
quit making up holidays to get me to go drinking with you
Apparently I told the bartender to stop putting ice in my drink because it was taking up too much room
He walks in. We each have a tiki torch. We say, the tribe has spoken. We put his out and then stab him with it.
her spring break bucket list included "break into The Swamp, blow him where Tebow has Tebowed"
Nothing says happy gameday like waking up in only an ACC Championship shirt in the qb's bed with a different football player
HE'S LIKE A GREEK GOD BUT HE'S FROM BOSTON. HE'S A BOSTON GOD
pray to him
I WANNA PRAY ON HIS DICK
for the record im never blowing a guy on the toilet again, that was sad and degrading
She told me she was the Publishers Clearing House of Dicks. Two dicks a day, everyday for life.
If this adventure is going to get us arrested it'll have to wait until Wednesday so that I can bail myself out.
If you shit your pants and not say anything about it right before we have sex one more time I'm dumping you.
I can't decide which is the most disgusting: emily having sex on the stairwell of a frat, michelle shaving her vagina with a razor she found in a frat bathroom, or me getting fingered on the dance floor by some rando. opinions?
Randomize
