Is it bad that everytime I read or hear "Woo Hoo" I immediately think of sex because of The Sims?
I dont understand how a fully grown man could convince himself that lime green crocks would look good on him.
Making jello shots drunk, i apologize ahead of time if they are too strong Can't taste anything.
After you verbally abused the McDonalds employee for not making your fries fast enough, the fact that you woke up on a random lawn does not surprise me.
Satisfying Perfect Camera Moments
I wish my brain had a "congrats you just defeated the munchies" notification!
Apparently love is stronger than SoCo
Just to circumvent as much mood-killing as possible, you are allowed a small amount of laughter at my pubic hair. Too much and I revoke your vagina privileges until you can get your shit together.
And we just chatted casually as i peed on the floor and she peed in the toilet
You couldn't remember her number so you tried to dial her name into your phone. Once you realized you didn't know her name, you dialed 7 random numbers
This Dog Travel Carrier is a Must
I don't see how you can turn down creme brulee and orgasms
Could we try to replay the decision making process whereby only you and I bought and drank a keg this weekend? Because there were some fundamental flaws!
Is it okay to thank someone for the orgasms they gave you, even though they weren't with you?
Is the Glover Park Chipotle past the strip club?
Why is that your only point of reference?
Just answer the question
So who left their underwear on a lamppost in my aunt's backyard
He sang a ten minute song about me sitting on his face and eating quesadillas. Pretty sure I have to marry him.