Texts From Last Night

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  (662): View more from Mississippi

  Do you think they could tell I was high on that conf call?

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  (662): Do you think they could tell I was high on that conf call? http://tfl.nu/dgsg
  Replies (6) Good night (1192) Bad night (534)
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  (805): View more from California

  saw my dad's penis on the x-ray last night. at least his hip wasn't broken

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  (805): saw my dad's penis on the x-ray last night. at least his hip wasn't broken http://tfl.nu/k7ra
  Replies (20) Good night (682) Bad night (3502)
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  (778): View more from British Columbia

  Should I text him? Life is confusing when you actually like someone instead of just wanting to blow them.

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  (778): Should I text him? Life is confusing when you actually like someone instead of just wanting to blow them. http://tfl.nu/fuhs
  Replies (15) Good night (4764) Bad night (813)
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  (214): View more from Texas

  You basically tried to anal probe my passed out friend with a lamp

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  (214): You basically tried to anal probe my passed out friend with a lamp http://tfl.nu/t0a5
  Replies (9) Good night (1360) Bad night (2688)
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  (440): View more from Ohio

  i yelled at him for a little and we ended up fucking in a random tennis court.

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  (440): i yelled at him for a little and we ended up fucking in a random tennis court. http://tfl.nu/yjxx
  Replies (13) Good night (3172) Bad night (946)
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  (559): View more from California

  And apparently midway I said "hurry up and finish so we can talk about what a bad idea this was"

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  (559): And apparently midway I said "hurry up and finish so we can talk about what a bad idea this was" http://tfl.nu/hg14
  Replies (12) Good night (1252) Bad night (2668)
• Favorite

  (970): View more from Colorado

  Just got complimented on my chugging... Car bombs show how good I am at swallowing, they should be my new pickup line.

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  (970): Just got complimented on my chugging... Car bombs show how good I am at swallowing, they should be my new pickup line. http://tfl.nu/60ef
  Replies (5) Good night (1623) Bad night (612)
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  (541): View more from Oregon

  I find out next week of the Australian was lying about his vasectomy or not. Keep your fingers crossed!

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  (541): I find out next week of the Australian was lying about his vasectomy or not. Keep your fingers crossed! http://tfl.nu/rzlj
  Replies (13) Good night (708) Bad night (2405)
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  (316): View more from Kansas

  I just threw up over a bridge. I didn't even know there was a bridge in this town. Vodka is like a transportation device.

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  (316): I just threw up over a bridge. I didn't even know there was a bridge in this town. Vodka is like a transportation device. http://tfl.nu/lmjt
  Replies (4) Good night (1617) Bad night (531)
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  (904): View more from Florida

  The problem with Wednesday evening drinking is that no gets to my level. It's like like a one man party. But it's a goood party.

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  (904): The problem with Wednesday evening drinking is that no gets to my level. It's like like a one man party. But it's a goood party. http://tfl.nu/d07s
  Replies (12) Good night (1362) Bad night (610)
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  (914): View more from New York

  I think I am calling out of work due to a hangover. I'm 96% sure there ISN'T tampon stuck inside me.

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  (914): I think I am calling out of work due to a hangover. I'm 96% sure there ISN'T tampon stuck inside me. http://tfl.nu/fqr3
  Replies (6) Good night (470) Bad night (1240)
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  (774): View more from Massachusetts

  I hope your fat roommate breaks the bunkbed and crushes you in your sleep

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  (774): I hope your fat roommate breaks the bunkbed and crushes you in your sleep http://tfl.nu/07gg
  Replies (6) Good night (2050) Bad night (751)
• Favorite

  (509): View more from Washington

  So how was your new years? Did u ride a horse at 3am in zero degree weather? Because I sure did

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  (509): So how was your new years? Did u ride a horse at 3am in zero degree weather? Because I sure did http://tfl.nu/hjy4
  Replies (2) Good night (1398) Bad night (393)
• Favorite

  (636): View more from Missouri

  Wednesday is my day of reflection and making my dick and balls into shapes. So i'll be pretty busy.

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  (636): Wednesday is my day of reflection and making my dick and balls into shapes. So i'll be pretty busy. http://tfl.nu/5193
  Replies (3) Good night (961) Bad night (459)
• Favorite

  (503): View more from Oregon

  Just had my very first high conversation with mom

  (541): View more from Oregon

  And you survived it! I'd say that earns you a "Blaze It Like a Real Adult" from the Grown-up Girl Scouts

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  (503): Just had my very first high conversation with mom (541): And you survived it! I'd say that earns you a "Blaze It Like a Real Adult" from the Grown-up Girl Scouts http://tfl.nu/2tag
  Replies (0) Good night (512) Bad night (238)

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