this is amy. the small petlike person from the womens bathroom at the reef.
I called him Han Solo during sex, he looked at me like he was mortified then I realized he came.
i just know my balls have never hurt this bad before
What would you say if I got first degree burns on my nipples from drinking coffee topless?
Supposedly i was taking multiple birth control pills while screaming dot judge me. Never going back
No no no. When you take one for the team, there are no stipulations or conditions
can we just pause for one second and address the fact that balls were out last night
passed out in the hallway last night, now I'm sitting down in the shower, eating lukewarm canned soup out of Tupperware, listening to Carly rae jepsen.. I had a rough night.
Dick sucking on arrival? or would you like to cash that in later?
She sleeps with her hand around my balls. First I thought it was just a comfort thing. Now I think it's to make sure I can't slip away in the middle of the night.
I sang Sweet Caroline with a homeless man and made him 25 bucks. Redbull vodka gives you wings!
Drinking hard cider in a room full of freshman girls. Never felt so secure of my manhood
I probably wouldn't
The angle I tried to shoot a load on her face was unfortunate. I accidentally came on the David Bowie tribute she had out. Oddly, that made it more erotic.
When he was leaving this morning he said I'll text you later on and I replied with if you don't that's cool too.
I must be pretty memorable. I was walking past this dude and he goes "There's the Scotch Girl." I have ZERO clue who he is, but I'm definitely the Scotch Girl.
Randomize
