I took off my bra and money fell out...how crazy was I tonight?
This ain't no lie cnn says sonny n cher's dtr chastity is going to have sex reassignment surgery to become a man named chaz
Not surprised. I always thought Cher was a very passable post op transexual.
my FASA form asked what i spent the majority of my 08 earnings on, im tempted to put "booze, blow, & blunts"
a slip n slide in 50degree weather was the 2nd dumbest thing i have ever done. the 1st was hitting the wooden fence i believed was supposed to "help us stop"
I have no idea where we are. But it doesn't look dirty so I don't think we are in jersey yet
Remind me to never go to the bar with your Asian friends again. I need to be able to read or pronounce what I'm drinking.
Dammit. I drunkenly drank all my milk at 6 AM in a misguided stupor to prevent my roommates from stealing my milk.
Fantastic. I'm pretty cold, tired, dirty, and hungry, but that comes with an adventurous weekend. Who needs a wallet or keys anyway? I could totally be homeless.
I just made cupcakes.... Vodka icing. Results in the morning.
He challenged me to a drink off, I couldn't just say no. It was a matter of pride really.
And as he was cursing your name from the bathroom you were ordering yourself another drink on his tab. The poor bastard had no clue you were a pro drunk
I had an epiphany. If a dude dressed up as Batman to ask me out, I'd prolly marry him.
As the cops are taking us away I see the strippers taking our DD backstage.
I can't wait to get home and drunk cuddle your dog
Nothing like introducing yourself to your high school boyfriend's wife as "the girl who took his virginity"
I'm sorry for chipping my tooth on your vagina last night :(
Randomize
