yup put them legs up on your shoulders and eat her like some folgers
eat her like coffee?
The sex was so not worth the four dollars it cost to drive over the bridge
we were spooning and you were the big spoon but you insisted that I call you "the ladle"
just saw an anti-abortion rally outside of the courthouse...so naturally i tossed them out a coat hanger i found in my car
my mom found all the used condoms in my bed side table
whatd she say to you?
no words- put them all in a circle, put the bible in the middle
Working out to an exercise video on OnDemand. Also, drinking beer and eating cream cheese with a side of bagel in between stretches.
Explain to me how it was that you spent the entire night playing pool with three lesbians and did not get a foursome out of it.
Thank god the bicycalist i hit was on drugs
I'm going to see if it catches on fire again, then I'll make the decision.
Model at car show < day drinking with your favorite sister. Get your head in the fucking game Christopher.
I'm sorry if you weren't drunk enough to be peer pressured into the naked dancing/group make out that transpired last night
I hate men. But I love dick. You see my problem?
I fell into a police barricade, a cop helped me up and asked if I've been drinking. I just looked at him and said "dude.." He proceeded to take out his handcuffs
Also I will be receiving my own bra in the mail because I left it at his place, woops
But actually he solved 40% of my life problems just in one dicking
Randomize
