we just got in the car and birthday sex is playing
that is a sign the 3 of us should have a threesome
we agree. completely
My recently uploaded pictures to facebook: Me partying on Beale St. with a single girl on each arm. Ex's recently upload pictures: Several pictures of cats. I win.
Urine might work for jellyfish stings, but we found out it doesn't work well for nose bleeds...
dont worry about it. i always have emergency bong water with me
I'm having a self conscious moment and I need your complete honest opinion of my boobs.
Our brains have an emergency blowjob override switch. You saw proof tonight.
you ate dog biscuits in front of my dogs and laughed at them for not have opposable thumbs
Secondly, that waffle is lost for good. I have no fucking idea where that bitch is
I almost lit my balls on fire tonight.
Last night I woke up and the national rep of his frat was sucking my toe.
why can't I meet attractive men at the places I like to hang out? like books a million. or the liquor store.
Cool. Some 22 year old kids gave me a ride home from the bar last night. In related news, I made out with a 22yr old last night. He was adorable
I'm horny too so maybe we will both recap our regrets on Sunday
So I'll be starting a scrapbook from all the mugshots of the guys I've slept with
they just got in argument over who had more of your dick pics. quit sending shit to my sisters fucker
Randomize
