Black lace...the rest is up to ur imagination
the ***** family is living proof that there are no more lifeguards in the humen gene pool
I was naked with an australian flag taped to my boobs. Damn internationals think they can claim everything.
I scrubbed the bathroom, smoked a bowl, and gave myself 3 orgasms. If the world ends today, I feel accomplished.
We couldn't get our shit together to go to the bar, so we're getting drunk and facebook stalking all the girls who have gotten fat since high school. Any names you wanna throw out?
Sorry I was drunk and left blood all over your back seat I was pretending to be in private Rayan and used your thong as a bandage
I lost it last night. That was humiliating. Cincinnati is now covered in my puke.
Jesus told me in my dream not to go to the party. I am athiest for tonight PARTY ON
Hey your work video crashed my computer. The 8 pornos running in the other window didn't. Congratulations.
the cops are being surprisingly chill about david hanging from a tree with no pants.
I think I just pulled an onion peel off my boob from sleeping on their kitchen floor
I'm gonna be the best dressed mother fucker to ever get kicked out of that damn bar.
I'm honestly wondering if my vagina did something to offend the universe
I gave up great shower sex to be here so don't say I never did anything for our friendship.
it's 1:30pm and i'm eating cheese while i sext. i need hobbies
Randomize
