By the way the awkward moment from yesterday is now a bad situation I have to figure out.
Thank you Grey Goose.
i was getting a blow-job tonight in the mens bathroom of a bar and the bouncer comes in and says "bro i don't mean to cock block but you cant do that here."
Just got a free shot w my beer...it's not quite 11am yet...I love international travel. These people aren't judgmental.
If I interpreted our horoscopes correctly...you should be coming home with an 8 ball. Just saying.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It took years to rebuild my brains forcefield against your charm and I feel like u seal team 6'd ur way in again and caught my common sense sleeping on post
That's the international "my vagina is unoccupied, come talk to us" chant. You have your mission. Go.
That's exactly how my pussy feels when I shave it. Like a cross between a naked mole rat and a newborn child. Embrace it.
he wouldn't lick chocolate syrup off of me because he's vegan. most awkward shower ever.
Only you two could pull off a partner swap with honeymooners
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He showed up at my door at 3 AM wearing a Santa hat with a tiara attached.
can we just punch him in the dick and call it a victory for feminism
He made a toga out of my hot pink bed sheets and cracked an egg on his head. Then he proceeded to alphabetize our DVD collection, which was impressive because I'm 99% sure he couldn't have done that sober.
Should I put the money for my dealer in a Christmas card? You know, make it more frstive?
Man I was just the closest I've ever been to crapping my pants.
thank god my bra was in my purse... were all good
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