im watching my roommate bang this girl. she doesn't look like she's any good, because he has a bored look on his face...
That girl's pussy is like White Castles, you crave it once in awhile, but you know next morning you regret eating it.
you were stealing lawn gnomes and punching cars. I'm not surprised you got arrested.
I woke up this morning peeing out bubbles . I smell like baby wash . What the hell happened .
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yea, i was tied up and blindfolded. And someone was throwing chicken nuggets at my face.
He offered to drive me out of state to meet up with my fuck buddy. Like best brother in law ever.
omg i just made best friends with a deer. Im like the drunk santa clause.
You kept asking her which dick pills worked the best. She's a grandmother.
Do you think it's wrong for me to hop on that dick before he realizes that he's gay?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
if a CSI technician examined our hotel room with a black light he'd think we hit the Pulse button a DNA blender without a lid
I've peed outside too many times in just this past week
Dude, she set my Tinder preference to men, set the radius to 100 miles, and used up all of my right swipes. I think she's mad.
Did your grand seduction include learning to play careless whisper on a kazoo or was that just a hobby
I mean, I let him sleep with me after we both ate taco bell sober... That's kinda like love, right?
You're a brave, albeit stupid soul for wanting in on the fuckery that comes attached to my vagina
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