I'm scared
There's nothing to be scared of. My penis is average size.
That's what I'm afraid of
i just uploaded three hundred pictures and you had your shirt off in two hundred and ninety of them
the remaining ten - you weren't in
I'm at a free clinic. Feel like I should cough or sneeze so it's not blatantly obvious I'm getting checked for STI's.
I've hooked up with six guys in my ethics class next semester...I feel like I've failed already
He got me an interview at his law firm and his boss asked him what he had to say about me. His response "He dates CRAZY bitches."
I'm sober in pajamas at a bar. Nothing is ok about that statement.
Woke up in my own bed with a "New Years Eve 2011" bar bracelet on. Both of these things confuse me.
Apparently drunk me thinks it's a good idea to put drops of acid in assorted open drinks in the fridge... This should be a fun week.
So was I the only one that was competing in the whale hunt?
I feel like a Europe failure cause I'm coming home from the club at 3:30 and so many people are just arriving... Wtf? 3:30am People! Drink earlier!
It's a Tuesday.
Bake him heart shaped cookies?!? Send him a picture of your tits like an ADULT!
Someone came into our hotel room and took our remote
What should I do?
One of these days I would like to go out drinking and stick to plan of just getting drunk and not be sidetracked with other people's plans of doing drugs along the way. I didn't even want to not feel my teeth tonight but here we go just another Thursday night when you live I live
Still drunk, heading to class.
It's 3 a.m. Dude
Doesn't mean I'm not at my desk. Ill wait.
I just wanna fuck your brother. Sorry if thats a crime.
Randomize
