so he stopped for a second, looked up at me and said in a really creepy voice, "I can has cheeseburger?" and then went back to eating me out.
but instead of smelling like hand cream and homemade cookies, she smells like a yeast infection.
i'm in the guys across the halls apartment. i think 7 MIP guy wants me. he just got a medical marijuana card. might be worth it.
10 dollar pizza all the toppings you want. Wait Until You See This Pizza
Dude they have ski ball. Anywhere that has skiball is bound to be bangin.
I'm full of awesome ideas
Yesss you are. Im full of confusion. I keep finding peanut butter on my legs...
You tried to poop in the sink last night.
Just wanted to remind you that you literally cut the underwear off a man.
my mom and grandma just had a splits competition. slut runs in the family
Dude.. You paid a stripper $50 to listen to you cry last night.
She kept grabbing my head and told my faces to stop shaking.. Also, she kept whispering something about seeing flowers in my eyes.
I woke up the other day with my Google browser open to "DIY lip injections"... I also just received a vial of hyaluronic acid and a package of TB syringes from amazon. I'm down.
I will have no part of this.
My life hurts
I woke up 30 minutes away from the bar, my car was at a train station, and when I got home all I got was the speechless head shake
FUCK IM ABOUT TO GET A DICK PIC IN THE LIBRARY
You don't get to call me bro after you've had your dick in me.
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